Hail to the Barbershop!
I am a rabid Redskins fan. Always have been, always will be.
I spent most of Yom Kippur services the other night checking the score on my cell phone.
Yes, this makes me a bad jew, but it makes me a REALLY good fan of the Redskins! I took a bitchy glare from some snobby Jewish mother for this shit. Mind your business lady.
Anyway, last season we saw some outstanding players emerge, especially on our offense. One of these players is Chris Cooley, a tight end only a couple of months older then me.
I still live at home and am "in between jobs" right now. I have a lot of respect for someone who has this much success at a young age.
On top of all of these things, Mr. Cooley is sort of sexy.
Yeah, he's got the football player, no-neck, thing going on, but never the less, still sexy.
See? Hot, right?
Plus he's a good ball player, and has already dealt with a cheerleader/wife scandal in his young career. Turns out he's also a good sport about jokes regarding said scandal. A local radio station had one of the girls involved with Cooley on to talk about what happened and the story blew out of proportion and the station got a lot of mileage out of jokes at Cooley's expense.
This season, however, Cooley is providing commentary on each 'Skins game every week. A big move for a big man.
All of this aside, I have an issue with him. He has decided it would be a fantastic idea to grow his hair out.
Oh folks, this is nothing.
As you can see, Chris Cooley has very curly hair. A Jew Fro if you will. Probably not Jewish, but irregardless.
See how it grows out instead of down?
My brother tried to do this in high school when all of the other boys were growing their hair out in the mid 90's. The problem was that my brother is the proud owner of a Jew Fro and the hair grew out. And oh, did it grow! He looked like Sideshow Bob in his class picture that year.
No, really...
Now, you probably think that this story has nothing to do with Chris Cooley, but you would be wrong....
This is the picture of Cooley from this season's team roster.
Not okay...I laughed...really.
At first, I thought that he was trying to emulate Jeremy Shockey.
Of course there are other ways to emulate Shockey. You know, you could traipse around town with Tara Reid or talk shit about your coaching staff.
But since Cooley isn't doing any of these things, I am starting to think he forgot where his barber is located or owns no mirrors.
I have no idea. I do think that all of the hair is messing with his game, because he hasn't been having a huge season yet. Come back to use Chris! We miss you and want you back!
Take a shower, cut the fro, score some mad touchdowns and lets take this season to the end!
Don't get me wrong though, I'd still hit it.
Yeah...I really, really would.
ps- is that Adam Archuleta behind him?? He deserves a whole different post ;)
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