Naturally Blonde: Tackling Menswear - Project Runway, Season 4, Episode 3

So I missed week one's BPR recapapalooza by like an hour.

And I missed last week's recap completely. Stupid family holidays. And it was Sarah Jessica Freakin' Parker!! If I ever get a couple of free hours, I might recap it, but as it was for Bitten, it was more boring then it could have been.

Onto this week. We have another guest to design for! Imagine that =)

Today's guest is none other then Giants star running back and all around handsome man, Tiki Barber. He's also the new host of Good Morning America or something. As a football fan, I mostly know Tiki as a killer running back. Seeing him all buttoned up and reporting is tres weird.

Still handsome though.

As we all know, I'm a big football fan, most notably the Redskins and most notably, Chris Cooley. I'm not so fickle though as to not care for the rest of my team and I'd like to take a moment to pay tribute and remember one of my favorite players from the past few years. Sean Taylor was murdered last week at his home in Miami. On top of being a member of the Redskins, he was also an incredible player. As a tackle, he was one of the most feared in the NFL and as a young man, he was just beginning his life with his fiancee and daughter. It's a damn shame and incredibly sad and since there was football featured in the episode, I thought I'd take a quick moment to honor a man who was on his way to being one of the greats.

This is Project Runway though and one thing I never thought I'd see on Runway is anything football related. It just doesn't go. And a menswear challenge is sort of mean spirited but we'll get into that in a minute.

Two of my favorite things to watch on TV have collided! And while it wasn't quite as disasterous as expected, it was a smidge on the boring side.

Although hot male models were around in abundance, so I really can't complain that much.

Yeah, could we actually get menswear challenges more often? That'd be great.

If they stick with football players and got Chris Cooley on next time, I could die one happy bitch.

So male models and gay designers and female hormones must have made for one sexually tense workroom.

Oh, except for Kevin. Did you guys know that Kevin ISN'T gay?? I know, right. A male designer who is straight. It's like an endangered species or something.

Except for, you know, Jeffrey, and Michael, and Vincent, (although his crazy factor makes him almost non-human anyway) and Robert, and if you combined Daniel V and Santino you'd get most of one, and parts of Daniel Franco (wait, seriously?).

Newsflash Kevin, staight designers aren't THAT rare, but kudos to you for beating us over the head with it. Much appreciated. You're straight, we get it.

Although that left hand does look a bit swishy and your facial hair is sort of immaculate.

But seriously, all doubt of his straightitude was put to rest when they met Tiki Barber, and Kevin not only knew who he was and what team he played for, but he knew the position and that Tiki was one of the best. Congrats Kevin! You've passed the test. Or something.

But enough about you, you straight piece of man meat and purple shirt making fool.

Does biting my nails make me look more manly?

Let's move on to the gays! Most notably, Jack who won this challenge.

Turns out Jack is incredibly muscular. His design was a little "Eh, it's okay" boring, but I think he won because he's the only designer that actually looks like a football player.

He's built like a linebacker! You know Tiki was all, "Yeah I'd wear that, but put that dude in a helmet and some pads and lets run some drills!"

Ummmm. No.

Jack doesn't strike me as the football type.

Here's his design though. Again, eh, boring.

Yes it's well put together and OH MY GOD!! the pocket is a cross stripe. Whoopy freakin' do.

I didn't get the judges going all ga ga over this when more intricate and better designs were ushered off the runway and didn't even make top three.

This was Jillian's design. I thought the fit was immaculate, it is four FINISHED pieces and the use of a colorful print on the shirt was interesting and in line with what the client asked for. Granted, I probably wouldn't have gone floral, but oddly enough it works.

I'm developing a total designer crush on Jillian. Her first dress was really adorable and her pre-show runway pieces were incredible. I think she's been underrated so far by the judges.

Hellraiser 15: Unappreciated Fashionista

I'm excited to see how she'll fare for the rest of the season.

I'm also starting to find Elisa overtly interesting in the way she designs.

I have no idea what she's doing here but it works. While her look was a bit Newsies it was well constructed. She's sort of nutty but in a happy way.

The rest of the best were Kevin and Kit. I can't lie, both of these looks were really strong, and again I'm surprised that Jack beat them out.

This look was awesome and I'm surprised it didn't win. The colors would have been great with Tiki's skin tone and the look was really sharp with a cool twist.

I'm just shocked a straight male designer pulled this off, because you know Kevin's not gay. Okay, I'm stopping. Seriously.

Maybe it's straight descrimination? We'll never know.

Kit's look had some issues but the overall thought process was really great. I didn't love the yellowish tint to the pant fabric and the jacket was a bit ill fitting, but the idea of using fleece was brilliant. It's a more casual look yet still really polished and since Tiki has a difficult frame to fit, fleece was a really smart idea.

Kit's totally growing on me. Her Bitten look, while legging based was also a favorite of mine from last week.

Plus, she's sort of adorable.

She's like Alison 2.0 or something. But potentially more talented and edgier.

You know who else is totally adorable?

He's so soft spoken and sweet! And his designs have been rather strong so far. I mean, aside from Marion's disaster from last week.

He's like a softer, less teary version of Andrae.

AND he's helpful! If he goes out on some weird fluerchon corset making Challenge in week 8, I won't be happy.

The whole drama of "borrowing" patterns from pants already being worn was dumb. Tim was even asked and said that was fine. Menswear is a pain as we'll see in a moment from the bottom three. It's harder to execute and most designers are geared towards womenswear. This challenge was borderline evil, but it really was better then I thought it would be.

Now, for the crap.

Ricky:

Not THAT crappy. I'm pretty sure the judges slapped him in the bottom to make him cry again. He's a lingerie designer and he made three pieces of menswear! That's a pretty big accomplishment. Yes the fit was a bit off and there were pins, but it wasn't THAT bad.

Poor Ricky. He's totally their puppet now.

Sweet P:

This wasn't good. The collar was just a fucking mess. Sweet P seemed to know early on that she'd have trouble though and I can't lie, I admire her for sticking to it.

She wholly committed to fucking up royally and that's an okay thing.

I'm so fucked.

Like, I'm seriously fucked.

Damn, Sweet P is fucked.

You know you're totally fucked, right?

But, at least she made a shirt.

Oh, Carmen. Where did it all go so wrong?

The crotch on the pants was 50 kinds of awkward the jacket was lopsided and the hat was ugly.

Oh yeah, you didn't make a shirt either.

All of the other designers at least had the basics. Pants and a shirt. It wasn't always pretty, it was always complete, but it was there.

See, this REPRESENTS a shirt.

No. It doesn't.

It's a piece of fabric draped over his nipples. You would have been better off sending him shirtless.

At least then I could have ogled a bit more.

She was clearly overly confident and missed the mark completely. Oh well, I didn't see her going far anyway. I always feel like these first several episodes always get rid of the sacrificial lambs in most instances.

Except for Malan of course.